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 I consider myself to be an obedient person when it comes to matters of a spiritual nature. I want to live the laws of God and I want to do what my Father above wants me to do. You could say I’m a rule follower.
The scriptures tell us to pray so I pray. But I think in my obedience I have been missing out. In my desire to only ask for what God wants for me I have been hesitant to ask for what I might truly desire. I had become a passive pray-er. I was afrad to pray for someone to be healed, what if it’s not Gods will. I was slow to ask for specific things because I didn’t want to be contrary to what is best.

Maybe I’m alone in this. But hopefully my struggle will help someone out there.

I prayed every night and morning asking for safety for my kids and guidance in parenting them. I prayed for insight into His will for me. At times when I felt very strongly that it was ok to pray for specific things like where to move or when to have our next child, I felt comfortable praying for that. I even felt comfortable asking for help when I was weak in a certain area.

I just didn’t feel like I could ask for what I really wanted that didn’t have lasting impact. Like owning our own home or help getting together the money to take the trip I have always wanted to Nauvoo or even how to help my daughter find clothes that help her feel amazing about herself. Could I plead for help with these things?

Then I come across statements such as these

Little children, young people, and adults alike, please believe how very much your loving Heavenly Father wants to bless you. But because He will not infringe upon our agency, we must ask for His help. This is generally done through prayer. Prayer is one of the most precious gifts of God to man.” J. Devn Cornish

He wants to bless me with all kinds of joy and guidance throughout this life. Even guidance on how to get to Nauvoo.

I am led to believe that our Heavenly Father loves us so much that the things that are important to us become important to Him, just because He loves us.” J. Devn Cornish

As a parent I greatly understand this. My kids will ask and ask for things that matter to them, over and over again when it’s really important or they just really want it.

For example my son really wants a play station 4 for his birthday. I don’t usually spend that kind of money on birthdays though. So he has started coming up with new ways to ask. “What if it’s Christmas and birthday.” “What if so and so goes in with me to get it.”

What man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?  If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?” (Matthew 7:9–11).

My eyes are open even further as I begin to truly understand that scripture. I have read it many times before but I am starting to really grasp the meaning for me. It’s not only ok but good to ask for things I want. Not as I would a magic lamp hoping whatever I desire falls into my lap but with hope that the things I truly desire can be available to me.

With that said I still firmly believe that after I ask I should always follow it up with “thy will be done.”  Hoping for my prayer to be answered, while recognizing His ways are better than my ways. Always He has my best interest in mind.

The other prayer mistake I have made in the past is to pray sincerely and truly for something and then forget to act. I do nothing but say a prayer or two. No action to help that desire come to pass. Just wishing at that point.

Often as I pray, the Spirit nudges me to admit that there is more I should do to receive the help I am asking from the Lord. Then I must commit and do my part. It is contrary to the economy of heaven for the Lord to do for us that which we can do for ourselves.” J Devn Cornish

Ultimately what I am learning is how much my Father wants to bless me. Just as I want to bless my children. And with that He also wants us to learn how to put in the effort needed for the greatest potential of growth. I don’t hand my children everything they want when they want it. But I strive to give them what I believe will be best and hopefully what in time will bring the greatest joy. I see now how Heavnely Father wants to do the same for me. I need to simply ask.

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