26. February 2015 · 1 comment · Categories: Joy
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Last night I woke up suddenly from a dream in which my best friend, Kathie, called me to congratulate me on a move to a new home.  The problem?  Kathie passed away from cancer in 2012.  But when I heard her voice in my dream I was so excited because she was able to call me from heaven.  When I woke up, I wanted to freeze the moment and I laid there for a long time trying to figure out why she didn’t say more to me.

There is just something extra special when you find a friend that really gets you.

Relationships are important.  Whether it is with family, friends or co-workers, the people that we spend time with will effect us for good or bad, happy or miserable.

We don’t get to choose our family, (other than our spouses), and most of us can’t choose our co-workers.  But we can choose which of these people we will embrace and allow into our thoughts and emotions.

But the friends you choose will be in your life as long as the relationship is nurtured.  It is a more unique relationship.  Sometimes you drift in and out of each others lives, but when you need each other, you can often pick right up where you left off.  And some friends are just for a small period of time, but can still have an impact on our lives.


I would like to tell you about Kathie today. She would come to our house for dinner, and birthdays. She watched my kids and would come to their sporting events. But mostly she was special because she cared about the relationship. If I hurt her feelings or got real busy and didn’t talk to her for awhile, she would call me up and talk about it. She never gave up on me.

Then when I was faced with the reality that my marriage was ending, she supported me with every emotional phone call. She just listened when I needed to cry. She was honest with me when I needed to be told something hard, and most importantly, she kept my confidences.  She was an amazing woman and a great friend. She is such a great example of what a friend should be.

I know I got a little off topic, but the point I wanted to make is that because of Kathie and many other supportive and wonderful people, I got through a very difficult time in my life. I had to choose good uplifting people to spend my time with, especially when I was trying to get my life back together after the divorce.

Now that my life feels a little more orderly, I need to remember to give back to others, and to be careful who I choose as friends.  Life is too short to spend time with people who bring you down, and dwell on the negative.  I want to choose friends who lift me up and make me smile.

Going through a divorce can be negative, but the people who supported me shared only the positive that could come to me. I want to be that kind of friend to others.  I want to be someone who makes others smile, and makes them feel like they are understood.

As I strive to find good friends in my life, I hope I can remember to be the kind of friend that Kathie taught me how to be.



1 Comment

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